Hi, friends! I hope you’re all having a great week. I went to the doctor today for my first visit since the positive blood test. I had to get repeat blood work to make sure my hCG level was doubling and a blood flow study to ensure my arteries were pumping an adequate blood supply to my uterus. Additionally, they were going to perform an ultrasound today to see if they could see the gestational sacs. Since I’m only 4 weeks and 4 days pregnant, they told us it was highly unlikely we would be able to see the sacs yet. We hoped we could, though, because that would tell us if we are going to have one baby or two. I was excited about the possibility of finding out so soon, but that didn’t matter all that much to me. Most importantly, I wanted to hear that my levels had risen appropriately and my blood flow looked good.
I got my blood drawn and then started off with an ultrasound. The tech told us it was too soon to see the sacs. I think Matt was a little disappointed, but I was more focused on the task at hand. Tell me that baby or those babies are healthy! Then it was on to the blood flow ultrasound. They checked my blood flow laying down and standing up. As it turns out, my arteries are doing a great job of pumping a nice blood supply to the uterus. Alleluia!
Once that was finished, we waited for an hour until the blood tests came back. I was so nervous! What if the levels hadn’t doubled? What if something was wrong? After what seemed like an eternity, the doctor called me into his office. My original hCG level last Friday (7 days post transfer) was 49. The hCG level only needed to reach 200 today to indicate a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby or babies. I prayed he would tell me the level was 200, but he didn’t. IT WAS ACTUALLY 465!!! Such amazing news! God just keeps blessing us at every turn.
My estrogen and progesterone levels were also right where they were supposed to be (FINALLY!). So, I can stop taking the daily injections and switch to cream and pills. I just can’t comprehend all of this good news. We are so blessed and all the glory goes to God for every positive thing that has happened to us.
The outpouring of love and support from family and friends has been almost impossible to digest. This baby or these babies are so incredibly loved already. Thank you to each and every person who has called, texted, prayed, come to visit, mailed us cards and gifts or reached out in any way. We are eternally grateful. My heart is still overflowing with joy, and I can’t believe this is real.
For the first few days it hadn’t sunk in at all. It’s finally starting to sink in, though, because I have been experiencing a lot of morning sickness, migraines, fatigue and food aversions. I feel like I am starving and then as soon the food is in front of me, I can’t even look at it and start gagging. The cool thing about going through infertility, though, is that even when your head is hanging in the toilet bowl, you have a smile on your face. I will gladly be sick every day until delivery if it means I get to hold my precious baby in my arms.
I am going back next Thursday for another ultrasound. The doctor said they will definitely be able to see how many babies are growing inside of me then, so I’ll keep y’all posted. Matt thinks it’s twins and I go back and forth daily between 1 and 2.
I want to share one more thing that is very personal. The day I found out my first fertility treatment didn’t work was the absolute lowest point I hit throughout my journey. I was so confident that it was going to be successful. When it wasn’t, I was shattered. I sobbed for an entire day straight and just didn’t know if I could pick myself up and keep going. It was probably the saddest I’ve ever felt in my entire life. I looked in the mirror, and I saw such a void of happiness in my eyes. It scared me, and the last thing I wanted to do was take a picture. I decided that I needed to take one, though, because one day I would come out on the other side. I could take a picture the day I found out I was pregnant and put these pictures side by side to see just how far I had come. Here is that side by side comparison for you:
I’m not sharing this because I think it’s a cute picture. I’m well aware of the fact that it’s probably the worst picture I’ve ever taken. The reason I’m sharing is because I want to inspire all of you who are still struggling with infertility or any other issue in your life. Maybe you have hit rock bottom and you feel like nothing will ever go your way again. It will. As Winston Churchill said, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” You might look and feel like the picture on the left today, and that’s ok. But I promise you, one day you will be the girl on the right. Keep trying, keep dreaming and keep your faith in God. Sending love and light to each of you! ❤